A Little Of This And That

Monday night cooking classes have been a big hit at our house. For the past few weeks we have been making different kinds of cookie doughs and putting them in the freezer in hopes of making Christmas Cooking Baskets.
I still haven't used my dryer! Yeah for me and the beginning of my frugal life! As I mentioned I was planning on starting to see how cheap I could get the grocery bill. Hubby messed that up by trying to help and going to the grocery store and spending far more than I ever would have on any day! So am planning on starting that next week.
We were sitting around the table and the phone rang(imagine that with 7 of us) Anyway it happened to be for me. It was the school needing volunteers. So I quickly agreed to help with the health fair. Then it happened. God smiled down on me and let his humor fly again. It was asked if my husband or I would be interested in supervising the upcoming dance. I quickly without hesitation volunteered my husband for this (partly because he always aggravates the children saying that he is going to do it) As I shared the joy with the folks at the table first a glare came from hubby (you know the look....the one that says....I was only saying that to get a rise out of the kids......why do you do this stuff to me) then the kids sunk in their seats saying please don't do it. The more they begged the more hubby was okay with it. So Oldest daughter said Okay you can go (as if she had a choice in the whole thing) anyway she said We gotta lay some ground rules. #1 you don't know me #2 I don't know you #3 stay with the other parents #4 don't try to dance #5 don't try to sing #6 and most important don't get up out of your seat, speak or make eye contact with anyone. HAHAHHAHHA Oldest son said my only request is don't hollar across the room " WHAZ UP DAWG" like a wanna be cool parent might.
Oldest son who is sensitive, sweet, and all around an easy child decided to change sports. So what do you do with a soft spoken, tender hearted boy? Sign him up for wrestling of course. The sick thing is he LOVES it. I tried to watch but feel the urge to go jank them monsters off my baby so have chosen to wait in the van until the end of practice.
Oldest daughter is back in basketball season full swing. She is good, if I do say so myself. Ask anyone in the stands they can tell you.....I think she is good. Which brings me to what I was told. Only and I do mean ONLY cheer when the other parents are cheering. I should not hear GO HOPIE GO at all I shouldn't hear you because of everyone else mom GEEEEZE
Youngest son last night while we were waiting in the van for wrestling to get over with got my key chain flashlight and started looking in everyone ear. We were all told that we have tubes and they look good and we could expect them to fall out at any time but not to be scared cause it want hurt. Then our eyes were looked at yep still seeing spots from this one. As we were told yep looks like you need glasses I think spider man ones will suite you fine. You have to take care of them and not sleep with them. Finally the one that brought tears was when he shined the light on our heads and said oh my what is that you got tumors but don't worry you get to take fun trips to the head dr. and if you are really good you can stay at the Ronald McDonald house and eat whatever you want to. You will have to have a shot though and it will hurt but then I will put you in a machine and look at your head and give you a toy so its okay. HAHAHAHA he is hilarious
Middle son is learning that no matter what I do at school or who I do it to my parents are going to find out so I might as well stop doing it. I will never say that he is coping with his ADHD well because if I do the bottom will surely fall out before I get home to catch it. So I am going to leave this paragraph with middle son is showing rays of sunshine at this time.
Youngest daughter has finally found a way to study multiplication without crying and snotting all over me. We have found a website that you type in whatever facts you are working on 7's or whatever and then a game pops up and she plays it for 30 min. each day and is getting very sharp at her facts now. I am very very proud.
Hubby well he is hubby. I wrote a note to his boss and the first line read 10 reasons why you should make Joe's check payable to me. Funny thing is the last line read ooops looks like Joe needs a raise.

Finally A New Post

This month has been busy, leaving little time to catch up on my blog.

I had a girls night our for the first time in a long time. Some friends and myself went to the Mexican restaurant, it was a lot of fun. When the Waiter asked what we wanted to drink I said Coke please but was quickly interrupted by a Friend who insisted that I wanted a daiquiris. One daiquiri led to another which led to me getting REALLY REALLY SICK but not before I muttered to my friend that she STUNK AS A GUARDIAN. You Cant take some one out who never goes out and expect them to run with the bid dawgs geeze.

I had dental surgery. I had all my wisdom teeth pulled out, 2 molars cut out, deep cleaning to gums and some bone graphs. The next day I felt good got a lot done around the house and then it hit me that night I was hurting. The next day we had a Halloween party for the kids at My sister's house. Hubby had to make 40 cupcakes after I slumped over in the recliner and began to drool (turns out pain pills make you do crazy things) the party went really good until my lovely brother in law thought it would be hilarious to turn on the fog machine right where I was standing and a tall kid was headed. The outcome of this hilarious action was the direct result of me getting head butted right in the jaw. Needless to say I ducked out of the party after that and hid in the living room. I think I am pretty much back to normal now (2 pain pill bottles later). The party turned out great and there was a big turn out.

Went to A Home and Garden's Party. My friends will appreciate this story. We had this "Get To Know You Game" you had to write down something about yourself that no body else knew. Seeing how these were all of my sister's peeps I didn't know anyone and thought I could write down anything or something that would embarrass my sister. So I took the higher road, nah only kidding I went for the embarrassment. I wrote that I have been married more times than anyone in the room. Turns out my sister has a bigger mouth than me and everyone guessed it. The humor comes in however when someone wrote I had a serious boyfriend and married someone else. Again everyone guessed me! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE! The joke was on them cause it turns out I wasn't the only wild child in the crowd. There was a sweet older lady sitting a couple of people away from me named Sarah. When she sheepishly said it was her. I was the one who jumped to my feet gave her a hive five with a GO SARAH YOU GO GIRL. Only to be told later that it was my sister's preacher's wife. My purchase came to 40 bucks the night however was priceless!!!!

The kids all had different classes they wanted to sign up for each being quite pricey so I came up with an alternative on Monday nights we now have a class (just me and the kids) This month is cooking. So far we have tackled and won the battle of sugar cookies. I even sent treat bags of the cookies to hubbies coworkers. Could have sworn I heard hubby mumble under his breath this is stupid. It was confirmed when one of his coworkers thanked me for the cookies that indeed that is what he said cause he said thanks for the cookies even though Joe said I know its stupid she made me bring 'em. Oh well, can't train them all. Next month they want to make crafts and then in January they want photography, in which I will be enlisting the help of my older sister.

Also this month I have managed to tackle two crafts for Thanksgiving. The first being collecting leaves and letting (telling) the kids to make place mats for the table. I then laminated them they turned out really good. We also tackled a little Thanksgiving Craft gift for the grandparents. It's always fun when you have one who doesn't want to do it and wants to slap it together to prove a point. It is even funner when I say WOW THAT LOOKS GREAT I HOPE GRANDMA HANGS IT SOMEWHERE SURE TO BE SEEN BY EVERYONE AND TELL HER YOU MADE IT!

My mom would be proud to know that I haven't used my dryer in 3 weeks in hopes of seeing a difference on the power bill. I wash a load a night before I go to bed and before getting ready for work I hang the load on the line to dry during the day. I am determined at her guidance to be more frugal and stop blowing money! I am taking small steps. My next big move is to see how cheap I can get the grocery bill and still feed the family. WHOO that will be fun. Little Debby is the devil anyways she goes straight to the hips.

I got the flu shot this month, and plan on taking the children to the pediatrician lining them up and getting theirs too.

I signed up for college (for myself not hubby) for next semester and hope to finally finish my degree.(while working full time, raising 5 kids and taking care of hubby)

Finally, I am getting my own office at work and am in the process of packing up and moving out. So I hope to start blogging once a week faithfully. I started out wanting to do daily but there is just know way. Hope everyone's day is more uneventful than mine.

Turns Out There Is Something Worse Than Helping A Friend Remodel.....The FBI Being After Your Kid

Well this weekend we helped Jodi with her remodeling job. We traded out jobs she painted our house so we are wiring her house. Either way you look at it nobody came out smelling like a rose! So at the time we all joked around because we said that there is nothing worse than remodeling.
Turns out that there is.....
Picture this....

My oldest son goes over to a friends house and his friend pulls out the phone book and randomly points to a number to call. My son pranks this individual. Well after a little pranking the individual indicates that he works for the FBI. Not only does he work for the FBI he has already traced the call. My son and his friend laugh and hang up. Well the FBI Guy calls them back. The boys chalk it up to caller id. Until that is the FBI guy tells them that he knows where they are at so he tells the address and says he is own the way to talk to their parents and that charges will be filed. Just in the nick of time (before my sons passes out, because he believes EVERYTHING) his friend tells him that it isn't the FBI its Mr. Mike the Sunday school teacher.You see Mr. Mike was renting a house while waiting for his house to be done so the phone was listed under a different name. The friend didn't randomly pick the number it was all planned out! After the shock wore off and the blood came back to his face he laughed about it. At our church homecoming we laughed and laughed about it. At least it was a lesson learned. You would think that the lesson learned is don't prank phone call people. Nope the lesson learned here is you never know when you are the one being pranked!

Yes We Know Rome Wasn't Built In A Day (But They Never Said Anything About A Fort)

So I am cooking supper and look out the window at a Six year old smuggling things under his shirt through the yard to the woods. This goes on for oh about six trips. Finally, I decide to check out the situation. So I sneak to the corner of the house and see a pile of power tools, hammers and nails. Thank goodness there were no saws! Anyway after further investigation it was concluded that the Six year old looks innocent and doesn't usually get in to things so he is far less likely to get caught sneaking tools out of the shop than anyone else. But it doesn't stop there. Guess who they have standing on the fort to make sure it's stable yep that would be the Six year old too! So when hubby gets home! I threaten him! I told him not to go and get the tools just yet and not to yell at them. The way I look at it they are learning a trade! Which means we have back up if college doesn't work out! SO what we did instead was to get the box of band aids lay them on the counter along with the insurance cards so we were ready. Luckily the day was un eventful!

Rats, Texting Grandmas, Extreme Haircuts and 5 page book reports

You know that commercial where the whole family is texting even the grandmother and we all laughed thinking who does that. ITS MY MOM! SHE IS THE GRANDMA THEY ARE REFERRING TOO! My daughter has my phone texting away. I ask the question that I already know the answer to but like to hear my self talk. So who you texting one of your friends? Nope. Had to do a double take cause old age is kicking in. So I had to ask for clarification. So you would be texting who. The reply I got was Gosh Mom you are so nosey its just Grandma. So if I didn't have to worry enough. I have a very social daughter that has a million friends she could text but chose grandma. I have a mom who knows how to text. GOSH!
The other daughter comes home and says can I bring home the class pet for the weekend. She asks while I am cooking, helping with homework and trying to hear Dr. Phil tell me how to get excited about my life. So I was like uhhh okay. Friday rolls around she gets in the van carrying a rat! Yep we were the home of a rat for the weekend. I must say that several threats came out of my mouth on the way home. Like YOU BETTER NOT OPEN THAT CAGE. YOU BETTER NOT EVEN THINK OF OPENING THAT CAGE. DON'T EVEN TOUCH THE CAGE.
I also gave out free hair cuts at my house last night. Sorry for the lack of invite. It was fun. Hair flying everywhere! My oldest asked to have his side burns trimmed. I granted that wish and then some. He got up with no side burns. I didn't get a tip or even a thanks mom. This is what I got. OH MY GOSH I LOOK LIKE I BELONG ON THE MOVIE BENCH WARMERS. So he wouldn't feel alone I put the youngest up in the chair who is crying real tears no mommy no please don't make me look like that. My intent was just to trim his but got carried away and he is sporting a nice new shaved look today. I tried to be positive and told him he looked like an army man now (which should have made him happy since he likes to pistol whip everyone) that didn't work what I got from him was MOM DADDY IS GOING TO KILL YOU. He insisted that I send his daddy a picture on his cell that way when he saw him the shock was warn off.
As for the other child who is in 5th grade. I told him to do his book report since it was due tomorrow. His reply was I don't know how to do a book report so I am just gonna wait. I said you are in the 5th grade and don't know what a book report is. He says nope I really don't. I said okay I will tell you so that you can sit down and do one for tomorrow. A book report is where you get out 5 pieces of notebook paper and write about the book. It is very important that you fill all 5 pages back and front and write small. It wasn't long before he remembered what a book report was and that the teacher told him to write only one page. This coming from the same child who said why can't you be like all the other mom's and just sign that I did my homework. Cause all the other mom's aint as mean as me. I have to work hard to be like this so get used to it.

We did NOT drop off the face of the earth close but didn't happen yet

Okay so what has been happening you ask? I'd like to say nothing. I mean NOTHING. You know eating chocolate, watching tv, underpaying the maid and spending money like no one's business. YEAH well take the total opposite of that and yep that is what I have been doing. Except for the maid thang. I am the maid and I am underpaid and over worked. We realized that we couldn't make it back in the day. My husband and I went to work over at our friend Jodi's house. Jodi is remodeling and they don't have their central air hooked up yet. It was hotter than you know where. How oh how did people live back then. After we got home and cooled off my husband went to the computer to do his homework to find out that the Internet is messed up. Again what did we do before Internet. We had to go to the library in an over crowded room and get his homework turned in. Only to go home to balance the check book to realize how can we print off our statement if we can't get online. So we called tech support at verizon after spending HOURS AND HOURS trying to convince a computer that we would really like to talk to a human we finally get someone with a pulse that says it will be 10 days before we can fix that. UHHHH are you going to lessen the bill. No sir........EEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRR C YAH BYE! What better way to unwind than to rent a movie off of Dish. Well HECK! Can't order it online so again call support at DISH. This is the actual conversation I am serious
Lady: How much do you want to pay today
Me: I am fine how are you
Lady: Clearly thinking oh great one of them
Me: I would like to pay nothing as my bill isn't even due yet
Lady: Well what can I do for you
Me: I would like to order Are We Done Yet
Lady: Who stars in that
Me: The guy that was in Are We There Yet
Lady: It would help if you could tell me who stars in it
Me: I really don't know his name
Lady: What is the event number
Me: OKAY its not an event I would like to order the movie ARE WE DONE YET
Lady: Event Number please
Me: Where is that located
Lady: I don't know but I have to have it
Me: DEEP BREATH
Lady: How did you hear about this movie
Me: Well it was funny we were flipping through the guide on our dish and it said on channel 502 Are We Done Yet starts at 9:30 my family thought that sounded funny how about renting it. Well our Internet is down so we thought it would be just as easy to call support clearly that is not the case so could you do me a huge favor and get the supervisor
Lady: I can't find that movie and I am the supervisor I think you are lieing to me
Me: LAUGHING Yep I have 5 kids but would rather call you to aggravate than to laugh at the 5 little comedians I have running around here

5 minutes later. Got dial up Internet. Felt like old school. Went online to dish website ordered Are We Done yet and went to bed!

So as you can see falling off the face of the earth would have been a better option than dealing with tech support!

Captain Moron and His Peeps!

Well, the five year old is having a birthday tomorrow and his exact words were " I can't wait until my birthday I have been five for two years!" I know the feeling I have been eighteen for ten years! He has spent his birthday week with his blankey tied around his neck like a cape going around the house saving the puppy from anyone they may want to hold it. His words each and every time being, " Captain Moron to the rescue" "Don't worry puppy I will save you"
The other kids have decided that playing cream the guy with the ball is way better than any video game they have. Because smearing someone guts all over the ground is much more addicting in real life. Well, better go clean up captain moron's mess and scrape up the guts left from cream the guy with the ball.

Shout Out To My Peeps At Drake!

After reading my comments from my last post it seems that my ex co workers are stalking me through blog. They have the hardest job EVER! They work at a call center and support a tax program. They just get a few seconds between calls during tax season! I thought I'd try the job despite the fact the only thing I hate worse than the phone is taxes! After shedding a few too many tears I decided to go back to my old job with my tail between my legs and beg for my job back. I got it. I do miss my co workers from Drake and would have stayed if they had agreed to give me a cubicle with no phone. Anyways I made three good friends out of the whole mess. Skeener who is the only person I know that leaves work and literally parties until time to go back into work by the time the buzz wears off he is headed to another party. The thing that I like about him is not the fragrance of alcohol. He has a big heart and is a lot of fun to talk too. Which leads me to Steph. She used to be a cheerleader. I used to think of cheerleaders as people who lived in those worlds where everything is daisies and fairies. NOT STEPH! Sister keeps it real and will break bad at any given moment. Which is what I like about her there is no blowing smoke. Finally, there is Jodi who I worked with for about 6 years she was the whole reason that I went to the call center.This is the discussion that took place

Jodi: Mel you gotta come work here it is the greatest job ever

Mel: I don't know anything about taxes

Jodi: Then your perfect for the job they don't want you to know about taxes

Mel: Well if your sure

Jodi: I am sure

SEVERAL WEEKS LATER

Mel: I can do this

MEL, Skeener, Jodi, Steph: hee heee heee lets make bets on who will quit first

A COUPLE OF MONTHS LATER

MEL: HAHAHAHAHA I took more calls than you HAHAHAHA even though I had to have lots of help. I WILL BE TOP CALL TAKER!!!!! HEEEE HEEEE HEEE EAT MY DUST!

SEVERAL MONTHS LATER

Mel:whine whine whine does the phone ever stop ringing

Jodi: Don't worry about it TAKE IT ONE CALL AT A TIME

Mel: heart racing whine whine I really can't do this

Skeener: no you really can't hahahahaha but its funny to watch

Jodi: you can do this

Steph: It will be a lot easier after your first tax season

Mel: Snotting and crying (decided the only way I would stay is if they gave me the job of driving the trolly. A job that was brought up in team since parking was such an issue.

Needless to say the trolly job never came up and I went out!

Anyway if I could take my peeps from the call center and the job I have now and stir them up then I'd have it made!

It's NOT Moday Already!

Geez I keep thinking it is Monday! Which means I am going to be messed up all week. I tried soemthing new yesterday and am anxious to see how well it works. I cooked up enough meals for this week so that when I get home all I have to do is warm it up! I am soooooooo excited this should save me an hour each night. So I could hmmmm lets see do homework with the kids, do homework for the kids ooooh I got it I can have the trampoline all to myself while the kids are doing homework. No seriosuly I am looking forward to having more time with the little rascals this week. It'll be fun! My mom likes to keep it simple I often read her blog about homesteading and wish I could do that. I am doing good to keep my head above water. Although I hope to share in that dream some day. Hope everyone enjoys there TUESDAY!

And Then There Was One ........(plus an extra)

What do you do when you have 5 kids and everyone has plans to be gone except one? You do the logical thing invite another one over. HAHAHA. Funniest thing happened well funny to everyone BUT ME! This morning my sister ( who is an angel when it comes to taking a few kids off of my hands) called and said can I keep two kids tonight. Without any hesitation what so ever I said yes as long as you want. Then the others made plans. WHEW looking like me and the hubby are gonna get some quality alone time (you know the kind I am talking about going out for an over priced meal then coming home to watch a movie with lots of violence and cussing since the kids aren't home) Well before my happy dance was complete. One child changed his mind and decided to not only stay home but bring his cousin over to. Oh, well. The thought of kidless was nice while it lasted! So we went to Berger King and rented the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle movie. YIPEEE! Oh well better go things are quiet upstairs and when things are quiet bad things are happening!

The Light At The End Of The Tunnel!

Well, 4 out of 5 kids have a plan for the future. Really 5 out of 5 but one's plan is NOT an option. Oldest son (sensible one) has decided to go to college and get his electrical license and take over the family business cause "dad ain't getting younger." Next child wants to be a judge and her plan is to go to law school be a lawyer and then become a judge. Next child wants be a professional dirt bike racer, when asked what was going to be his fall back if that didn't work, "I don't have one because if you think like that then it want work" Gotta love that attitude! Next child has decided that she is happy living at home with us and doesn't want to leave home ever. THIS IS NOT AN OPTION! Youngest child has decided that he wants to be one of those truck drivers that you see on t.v. that drives across ice 3 months out of the year in Alaska. He really said "I want to be an ice road truck driver that is where the real money is at" Keep in mind he is five so I will be changing his mind too!
The 10 year old decided on band this year and wants to play the flute like her mom did (secretly did the happy dance because I think she likes me after all). When we went to school for the night meeting about instrument's and responsibilities I was waiting to cut a check and my daughter was in the corner with friends as if she is to good to have a mother (it is amazing how quickly I become mother dearest at money distributing times) anyway I only had the five year old besides her I was sitting and waiting and got bored (mother of 5 who isn't used to idle time, can get into more trouble than a whole pack of kids) anyway I glanced over at the 10 year old hanging out with her friends and looked down at the five year old sitting on my lap playing his game boy and I let out a laugh you know the one HEE HEEE HEEEE (evil laugh) and my five year old said what mom. I said do you want to embarrass your sister. As if I had to ask. So I whispered in his ear and he was off over to the corner where the divas were catching up on the latest drama. He then begins to dance not just a little jig but a big ole booty shake dance and topped it off with a big ole booty slap. Hope came marching over to me dragging her brother by the arm her face was red and she was mad. She then said "YOU REALLY NEED TO WATCH HIM BETTER MOTHER" so I replied "oh my I sure do Hope" She went back and and my son and I had a good giggle over it.
Life is too short not to laugh along the way! Hope everyone finds some humor in what the day brings!

Whew!

This week has been a long one and it's only Wednesday. Hope started 6th grade this year which is at the middle school. As we turn into the school drive she starts "mom.......oooooh mom.......I am gonna be sick.....ooooh I can't do this" after a little encouragement and a swift kick out of the van she did fine. Julie who moved up to a school that is for 3rd thru 5th decided that she would make friends with the wild kids so no one would pick on her. This was not her smartest idea. Her 2nd day of school ended with me standing at the doorway shaking my finger whipping out a list of people to avoid and behaviors that she'd better snap out of before I go snap dragon on her LOL. Justin who is in first grade, although is doing better than last year (crying the whole way to school) decided he wanted to see exactly how strong the morning greeters are. So when we pull up to the drop off spot at school. He clings to the inside of the van as the little ole nice lady pulls and pulls. She is a tough broad as she seems to win every morning. Which leads me to Woody and Zack. Woody has decided I need to fix some breakfast in the mornings after all how is one to socialize in the morning with peeps if they are standing in line waiting for the a.m. grub at school. Zack (our little ADHD angel) I went back and forth over do I give him his med's before school the first week. Or do I let him go without meds which will lead to anything happening the rest of the year being a bonus (while on medication) versus starting the meds and risk them saying could you up the dose already......I took the higher road and gave him his medication.
Not to even mention the crazy work week. We are in training all week. Someone thought of some unique ways to make the week more fun. Tuesday was crazy t-shirt day and today is camo day. So I thought wouldn't it be funny to go to Wal-mart buy some of that printer paper that you can get that iron's own t-shirts and print off embarrassing pictures of my co-workers and wear it. Well heck with thinking about it I went ahead and did it. Turns out I was the only one who found the humor in the whole thing. Today I am wearing my camo pants and one of the kids brown military shirts with a hedden patch own the sleeve. How do you say does a mother of 5 have time to sew a patch on a t-shirt in the morning while trying to get all of her little chick-a-dees ready its easy hot glue gun works a lot faster than my sewing machine!!!!!!!
Hope it calms down around here!

A Little Of This and A Little Of That

In case you were wondering why I started to blog again. This is therapy for me cause to tell you the truth the Wellbutrin aint cuttin it. As long as I can recall I have always worried about everything, I do mean EVERYTHING! To prove that God does have a sense of humor I have been blessed with five children. As if I didn't have enough to worry about, these days my biggest concern is keeping it together until our five year old turns eighteen then I am going to party like it's my birthday for the rest of my life!
I also have family scattered all over the place, so this will be a way for them to keep up with what is happening with our bunch! My mom and cousing have blogs as well, I will have to get my mom to show me how to post links to them though. Yep, I know it's sad when you have to get your mom to show you how to work your computer. I am over that whole pride thing though! I call her about everything else (how to get gum out of hair, to apologize for the way I acted, what do they mean by lard (yep really did ask her that and then I said why don't they just say Crisco, mom) apologize for the way I acted, to ask every and any health concern that comes up at any hour and finally did I mention apologize for the way I acted, because I seem to be paying for an awful lot, just between us I think this is God showing me his sense of humor again.
Well, I hope I haven't bored you too much. I should probably go swith over the load of laundry and write the two page paper that is due tonight for my hubby ( that likes to whine because he is going to school) he goes physically but I do all the work. Why isn't he doing his own paper you ask. That would be because we spent 25 bucks on air soft bullets and BB's. Yep that's bright give five kids some amunition and keep thinking that they will only shoot the target and not each other. Denial works for us! Well that's all for now!